Another Day Of Loving

“Love has no desire but to fulfill itself. To melt and be like a running brook that sings its melody to the night. To wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving.” – Kahlil Gibran

Happy Valentine’s Day, Lovers!

Love,

Mish.

****

“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”- Swedish Proverb

The Love Culture on FB: https://www.facebook.com/theloveculture

Loss And Love Are Both From The Opposite Ends Of The Same Rainbow

“When you are sorrowful look again in your heart, and you shall see that in truth you are weeping for that which has been your delight.” – Kahlil Gibran.

I mourn the loss of a loved one I have come to know fondly as Nai-Nai, which means, grandmother.

She never married. Never had any children of her own. And yet, it is obvious for all to see, that her Presence and Absence were greatly felt…

…by the ones she loved.

In the 5 years that we’ve met, she’s often asked, “Kei Si Cham Cha, ah?” 

In the Chinese culture, when an elder asks you that question, literally, it means, “When will you serve (me) tea?” But its more an expression of desire to see you married, and to be served tea during the wedding’s tea ceremony, so they too can share in the sweetness of your happiness.

Most of all, it is pretty much an open declaration that you are loved.

~

It is in this moment of coming together, to grieve and mourn for our beloved Nai-Nai, that I was told by Mama, that they too, had mourned the loss of me… I was stunned. Who is Nai-Nai and Mama, in relation to me? 

Nai-Nai was the nanny of Mama, and she stayed on to become the nanny to Mama’s boys. And her boys were very good friends with this boy who stayed up the hill, but spent most of his time down the hill, at their home, doing what boys do best. They ate together, jammed together, fought together, laughed together, and through the years, grew up together.

Nai-Nai, Mama, Papa and the whole family, had embraced this boy from up the hill, like one of their own. When I came into the picture, I had not guessed, that I too, would come to be loved fiercely as one of their own.

After the break up, I learnt that the family had been heartbroken, along with me. And what they did to honour the sanctity of that loss, as I found out today, first from one of the boys, and then from Mama herself…

…silent me with Love. 

I didn’t know what to say.

Except, a quiet thank you.

“The best feeling in the world is knowing your Presence and Absence both mean something to someone.”

In her own way, this is Nai-Nai’s final gift to me.

~

I guess at the end of my grandmother story, all I’m trying to say is:

Are you willing to go through a painful time of Loss, to discover a beautiful depth of LoveThey are both from the opposite ends of the same rainbow. Your time of Loss, will eventually lead you to Love…

…Deeper, harder, stronger.

And sometimes, as Nai-Nai has so lovingly shown, Love is a Question.

~

Love,

Mish.

****

“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”- Swedish Proverb

The Love Culture on FB: https://www.facebook.com/theloveculture

‘A Tear & A Smile’ by Kahlil Gibran

“I would not exchange the sorrows of my heart for the joys of the multitude.

And I would not have the tears that sadness makes to flow from my every part turn into laughter.

I would that my life remain a tear and a smile.

A tear to purify my heart and give me understanding of life’s secrets and hidden things. A smile to draw me high to the sons of my kind and to be a symbol of my glorification of God. A tear to unite me with those of broken heart; a smile to be a sign of my joy in existence.

I would rather that I died in yearning and longing than that I lived weary and despairing.

I want the hunger for love and beauty to be in the depths of my spirit, for I have seen those who are satisfied the most wretched of people.

I have heard the sigh of those in yearning and longing, and it is sweeter than the sweetest melody.

With evening’s coming the flower folds her petals and sleeps, embracing her longing. At morning’s approach she opens her lips to meet the sun’s kiss. The life of a flower is longing and fulfillment. A tear and a smile.

The waters of the sea become vapor and rise and come together and are a cloud. And the cloud floats above the hills and valleys until it meets the gentle breeze, then falls weeping to the fields and joins with the brooks and rivers to return to the sea, its home. The life of clouds is a parting and a meeting. A tear and a smile.

And so does the spirit become separated from the greater spirit to move in the world of matter and pass as a cloud over the mountain of sorrow and the plains of joy to meet the breeze of death and return whence it came. 

To the ocean of Love and Beauty — to God.” – A Tear And A Smile by Kahlil Gibran

Love & Inspire,

Mish.

****

“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”- Swedish Proverb

The Love Culture on FB: https://www.facebook.com/theloveculture

11 minutes to 11.11.11

LOL. If I had it my way last year, I would’ve been married tomorrow, on 11.11.11!

A thousand million thoughts have been making its long and arduous journey, across the sinking sands of time, past and present, to reach this very moment.

And yet surprisingly, on the eve of 11.11.11, the feeling is liberating.

With news of a thousand couples set to be married tomorrow, their stories of proposals and triumph paraded for the whole nation to see.

I was amazed I feel no pain, no envy, and no wish to be one of them.

I look at pictures of the blissfully wedded brides-to-be on the beautifully symmetrical date of number ones—and actually feel happy—FOR ME!  🙂

Someone Up There had a better plan for me all along.

In the process of making that happen, my life has been turned upside down, inside out—for good and for love’s sake!

And I can honestly say, I’ve never been happier as a person or more secure about myself or been this comfortable in my own skin. I’m still a work in progress but I’m loving the progressions made so far.

It took a lot of pain and hurt and anger and confusion and grieving and fear to get to this place of growing and trusting that everything’s gonna be okay—but it’s been so worth it.

All my life, I’ve given the power of happiness and love, to another person.

I’ve made him my sun, my moon and my stars.

That is A LOT for a mere man to live up to! It always feels great at first, both for the worshipped and the worshipper.

But what happens when the sun doesn’t shine anymore and the rain doesn’t end?

Ours wasn’t a love story that would stand the test of time.

He is not God. I shouldn’t have expected him to be so.

Like most men, he was gone like the wind.

Here today, not always here tomorrow.

And here I am, in the present…

…Single, but wiser.

Stronger and happier, and more loved up than I’ve ever been.

The good news is it has nothing to do with a man—but everything to do with Love.

And that, my Lovers, is the secret to your happiness.

You can be with a person and be the loneliest person in the planet. You can rock the biggest diamond and still be the unhappiest person in the world. You can live in a mansion and still be the poorest person at heart.

What you seek, you already have—all along.

LOVE is what you are.

So come 11.11.11–let’s  raise our glass and give a toast! To Love. To Life. To YOU. 🙂

Be Love and Be Loved,

Mish.

****

“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”- Swedish Proverb

The Love Culture on FB: https://www.facebook.com/theloveculture

The Road More Travelled

Photo credit: Khairil M. Bahar

Having spent the most recent couple of years learning a lot about myself than I ever have, I have begun practicing the art of voluntary simplicity.

Back in 2004, I could get away with saying that I couldn’t afford it, and by now I have indeed saved enough to invest in a set of wheels.

But I have chosen not to, not because I am miserly.

One of the most rewarding aspects of public transport is the sensory ambush.

I have probably seen, heard, felt, smelled and tasted more of the city than the average car driver in KL. The alleys, the pathways, the street food, the sea of faces… they never cease to fascinate.

I look up into the sky and observe how tree branches compete for sun, how streetlamps flicker, how clouds form.

I sit in the bus and hear arguments, laughter, languages I have never heard before, conversations struck between strangers.

I watch a flurry of hands as deaf friends discuss a topic undoubtedly exciting. I listen intently to the life stories of cab drivers.

I teach toddlers on the train and the bus stop how to give high fives to the amusement of their mothers. I hold the hands of blind people as they cross the street in Brickfields, I feel the gentleness of their palms and the gratitude in their voice.

The smell of jasmine, exhaust fumes, incense, body odor, rain, sewage, keropok lekor, waft through my hair, besiege my nostrils, and hurl my floating state of mind back into the unique Malaysian madness I choose to make my presence in.

Eyes of passing strangers meet mine and enrich me with a sense of community.

There have been moments I have found myself less than appreciative of the flawed public transport system, but never for too long. A couple of weeks ago, I was feeling exhausted after a long humid day of work and extensive commuting around the city. I was making my way to my last appointment of the evening in Bukit Bintang, when I happened to pass by a group of street percussionists.

Their pounding rhythms compelled me to stay a couple of minutes. One of the drummers spotted me bouncing in the crowd, and pulled me into the centre of their circle. Turned out they were performing their last song. To the cheers of the crowd, I put down my bags and unleashed my inner monkey.

I met my friend sticky but revitalized. He asked, “What happened to you?” I laughed, and forgave myself for ever feeling ungrateful.

General consensus is that public transport in Malaysia is impractical and a waste of time. But with a new adventure that awaits the moment I step out of my house, with the things I have seen, heard, and been a part of, and the deep breaths I take when people ask me how my day was, perhaps being impractical and wasting time isn’t too much of a bad thing.

Love,

Davina

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Davina’s profile spans over a decade as an actor, writer, events manager, dancer, host and voice-over artiste. She most recently performed in the new musical THE SECRET LIFE OF NORA (Enfiniti Vision Media). She will be appearing next in a new murder mystery play KLUE, DOH! (Terryandthecuz Productions) in December, and in English independent movie RELATIONSHIP STATUS, written and directed by Khairil M Bahar, to be released early 2012. In her free time, Davina pursues sustainable living, animal rights, photography, sports, and buses when she is hellbent on catching them before the lights go green. Follow her on Twitter:www.twitter.com/duuuhvina

What do we know about Libya?

To answer the question, let’s be honest: Not a lot. Some of us didn’t even know of the existence of Libya before the invasion.

And now that we think we do, what else do we know besides the name Ghadaffi, his flamboyant style, his platoon of female bodyguards and the label “tyrant”?

The media knows that sensationalism sells. So have we been buying it, lock, stock and barrel? Are we content with flipping channels on tv and pages on newspapers or have we tried to see Libya through the eyes of Libyans?

What do we know of this land not our own, whose people look different from us, dress different from us, talk different from us and live different from us?

Let’s be honest now: Not much and not nearly enough.

But this much we do know, Libya didn’t need a “humanitarian mission” to bomb their University, Hospital, Clinic, Residentials, Food and Water Supplies and City, causing death to massive innocent civilians in the name of  “peace”.

I am surprised and disturbed by the silence all around regarding the plight of Libya.

I’ve also been called many things for having an opinion of my own, and labeled “pro-Ghadaffi” and “pro-Saddam” and “not knowing what I’m doing” and “making a fool of myself” and “not thinking properly” for posting up videos and articles that shows the other side of the story not shown by mainstream media.

How about this. I am pro-Humanity and pro-Justice and pro-Life.

At least I do not claim to know all there is to know about Libya and Ghadaffi and NATO’s true mission for invasion–even though it stinks of greed.

I only know that my heart bleeds at the sight of Libyans crying over the dead bodies of their babies, children, brother, sister, father, mother and fellow Libyans.

I only know that I do not wish to see that look of Fear and Terror that is so apparent on the distressed faces of Libyans, on my own family’s face one day.

I only know that if this can happen to Libya today, it can happen to us.

When it does, do not be surprised by international apathy, as we are now so guilty of. Our tears and rage and loss will just be another foreign conflict in a foreign country–far, far away.

A convenient flick of the TV channel and it’s out of sight and out of mind. A flip of the newspaper page and it’s on to the next headline. A change of YouTube channel and it’s back to Worst Dressed and Best Dressed Celebrities of the day.

I can imagine this to be the natural response by observing our current response to Libya.

But because this blog is about Inspiring a Loving Way of Living, I’m not here to point fingers at anyone but to point out to you, the power that is in your voice.

Speak up for the weak and the powerless–it’s the least YOU CAN do, right now.

SHARE this post or many other posts like these on your facebook / twitter.

“On some positions, Cowardice asks the question, “Is it safe?” Expediency asks the question, “Is it politic?” And Vanity comes along and asks the question, “Is it popular?” But Conscience asks the question “Is it right?” And there comes a time when one must take a position that is neither safe, nor politic, nor popular, but he must do it because Conscience tells him it is right.” – Martin Luther King.
~
Marvel at the life-enhancing possibilities of Libya’s Great Man Made River,  a vision birthed by the “tyrant” Ghadaffi to provide precious water for the African region by 2015, turning the desert green and producing food where there was none. The Libyans calls it the “8th Wonder of the World” and with well deserved pride. Believe it or not, a country can do well without foreign intervention. I have said my Peace.

Love Libya,

Mish.

****

“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”- Swedish Proverb

The Love Culture on FB: https://www.facebook.com/theloveculture

Work To Make Love Last

Goldfish are one of the most rewarding pets to keep. Like little puppies, they are always super excited to see you–especially in the morning, they go nuts!

They swim like they’re flying, stage a dance-off for attention, have incredible memory, striking personality and individual food preference too.

I love my goldfish.

Pebs in her quarantine tank back in Sept 2010... Best 1 year 7 months with her.

Pebbles in her quarantine tub

Pebbles is about the size of my palm lengthwise, and her head’s slightly bigger than a golfball. She’s a playful Crystal Ranchu–a type of goldfish with pretty, sparkly scales. With her big, beady black eyes, she makes you think you’re looking at a live anime! I hope she lives forever and I tell her a million I Love Yous everyday cos I do love her…

…or do I?

I realize that inherently, it’s so easy to think I love my goldfish because of how she makes me feel. But when it comes down to practical love, that’s one department challenging me all the time to prove it.

One thing you must know about goldfish is, they’re high maintenance.

If you don’t realize the amount of time and work needed to keep them alive, it’s easy to assume goldfish have very short lifespans. The truth is,  a wild goldfish can live up to 30 years. And a fancy goldfish, up to 12 years. With lack of awareness on proper care, a goldfish may not make it past 3 months.

If you’re planning on buying a goldfish, there’s a lot more to keeping them alive besides feeding them and changing water.

You need to  read up on goldfish healthcare, be aware of the various symptoms of diseases, learn how to treat it, have meds ready stocked,  maintain a balanced water pH, invest in a good filtration system AND keep the filter clean.

Now, cleaning the  filter is TEDIOUS work.

I have to take everything apart, wash each bioballs in tank water, clean off the sponge, empty out all the muck and rinse out the containers in hot water, brush out the pipes and then reassemble everything. This takes FOREVER. By the time it’s done, my body is aching all over.

Everytime I say “I Love You” to my goldfish, I must be ready to put in the work needed to keep her healthy, happy and alive.

What are you willing to do to keep LOVE alive?

This LOVE can be a relationship, a friendship, a significant someone, your friend, your family, your business, your dream or your pet.

Besides enjoying the pleasure and happiness it can bring on a good day, are you willing to put in the time and effort needed to maintain it and make it last?

Out of Faith, Hope and Love, Love is the greatest of all because true love seeks to be a solution to a problem and not just a prayer or hope for a solution.

LOVE is proactive–it does not turn a blind eye, it does not wait till it’s too late.

LOVE is willing to open up that can of worms with the intention of cleaning it.

LOVE is willing to risk discomfort to go through that vital maintenance process.

Do you LOVE, truly?

Or do you want to take the easy way out and assume love won’t last long and let it die prematurely?

WORK to make love last–it’ll be worth it!

Long Live Love,

Mish.

****

“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”- Swedish Proverb

The Love Culture on FB: https://www.facebook.com/theloveculture

Empty

Every so often, the negative voices within will be trippin’ us up with who said what and what they did and how we’ve been wronged and so on and so forth.

When you hear it, it’s so easy to play it on repeat for the purpose of amplifying that pain to the size of the universe.

It’s so easy to forget the 100 things that went right before that 1 thing went wrong.

If you’re as drained and as tired as I am from those voices, today, let us begin to recognise those voices as a deep cry from within, just to be loved.

So allow yourself to be loved.

Don’t hold it in.

Surrender.

Give it Up,

in prayer.

As we release it all–the hurt, the anger, the bitterness, the fears–we become like an empty vessel. In exchange, invite God’s Unfailing Love to come in, to sing you a Love song from Up above, to fill you up where you need to filled, to heal you where you need to be healed, to love you where you need to be loved.

Love,

Mish.

****

“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”- Swedish Proverb

The Love Culture on FB: https://www.facebook.com/theloveculture

Work Is Love Made Visible

I’ve got a friend who looks like Asia’s version of Ashton Kutcher. Tall, not so dark, but handsome, he’s away on a major Adventure. As of now, he’s holed up in Groningen, “a small town at the northern part of Holland, very close to German’s border” he says.

Next, he’ll be off to Berlin for all of three weeks! We’re talking massive travelling here. Enough to make us all go green with envy! So it came as a surprise that out of anything he could’ve talked about, he chose to open up his heart.

What he said next, is something I’ve been hearing A LOT lately. It doesn’t matter if they’re 18 or 20, 24, 26 or 28, 29, 30 or 32, one by one, everyone’s been more or less saying the same thing to me: “I’m still very lost… I don’t know what I wanna do.” I don’t know why they choose to tell me that. All I know is that I’m very much just as lost as they are.

I hated it at first, but now I’ve embraced being lost with the full curiosity and wonder of a three year old.

But honestly, I did a whole lot of freaking out–half a year of totally freaking out–before being okay with being lost and being okay with freaking out over being lost!

I’ve discovered that it’s all part of the package deal.

I’ve also found that the longer I allowed myself to stay lost, the more I began to see things I never would have otherwise seen had I been on the fast and usual, easy route.

I’ve always gone in and out of the forest of life so quickly. I’ve never been lost long enough to see the hidden secrets of the jungle and the many treasures and adventures just waiting for me in there.

This time, I went in like Alice in Wonderland, not knowing Who I Am, just wanting to find my way home.

But as I ran around frantically trying to find my way out, I’ve slowly begun to see that everything around me was and is my Teacher all along. And they’ve been leaving me clues to Who I Am, all the while.

As I drank from the bottle of Wisdom and ate from the bread of Life, my Fear of the Unknown began to grow smaller and smaller as my Love for New Possibilities began to grow bigger and bigger.

I’ve come to the present conclusion that the answer to the question “Who Am I?” lies in knowing “Whose I am”.

As I began a deeper relationship with my Creator, I began to see that I am Made in Love, Made of Love and Made to Love. But knowing WHY on earth I’m here is not enough. I’ve learnt that we each have a powerful role to play.

And that is to share our Love Story.

The Plucking Of A String, is a Guitarist’s Love Story, strummed out. The Ink on a Canvas, is the Artist’s Love Story, painted out.  The Idea In A Line, is a Poet’s Love Story, crafted out. The Playlist on a Disc, is a DJ’s Love Story, blasted out. The Quiet Listening Heart, is a Therapist’s Love Story, hearing us out. I could go on and on but you know what I mean.

We’re lost because we’ve forgotten Who We Are.

When we rediscover “Who I Am”, we discover Love.

The world is just waiting for You to share You. Are you ready to share your True Love Story?

I’ve read a quote somewhere that sometimes, people need a story more than they need bread! They need it like oxygen. Your Love Story poured out, might just be the ray of Hope they’ve been looking for at the end of a very dark tunnel.

Khalil Gibran, said it so powerfully in poem, “Work Is Love Made Visible.”

Right now, am I still Lost? Very much so.

But it’s been an enriching journey and I know it’s just a matter of time before I find my way out. So while I’m here, I’m going to ENJOY it and learn from it as much as I can, and have fun with it while I can!

ps: Dolphins are one of the best example of Love Made Visible! Look at them doing some really phenomenal things with bubble rings. Who knew they could do something like that?! I didn’t! It’s AMAZINGGGG. And all the Dolphin did was BE a Dolphin. Watch and be Inspired!

Love,

Mish.

****

“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”- Swedish Proverb

The Love Culture on FB: https://www.facebook.com/theloveculture

I Love Tea, not Animal Crueltea…

Every day, I love sipping on tea while writing and going through the daily grind. Today, while checking my mails and enjoying a glass of BOH Tea, I received a mail from PETA, informing me of a brand that practices Animal Crueltea, just so more people would drink tea!  We live in a world driven by greed, and this company is not the exception. Question is, what can we do about it? Being aware is one. Spreading awareness is second. In just 2 steps, you can counter a sad situation by being a part of the solution. The Love Culture begins with you and I. Watch this and share it:

Enjoy your Tea! ❤

Love,

Mish.

****

“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”- Swedish Proverb

The Love Culture on FB: https://www.facebook.com/theloveculture