It’s funny (and I love it) how time and time again, I am reminded that the very thing you teach, is the very thing you need to learn.
On Sunday, a beautiful young lady was sharing her heart out with me and we got to the topic of Self-Love.
I listened to her idea of Self-Love and suggested for her to check out 1st Corinthians 13. “Love is Patient, Love is Kind.”
Are you Patient, with You? Are you Kind, to You?
When we are patient with ourselves, we are kind to ourselves.
How we are with ourselves, is how we are with others.
That’s why learning and practising Self-love is important.
Last night, a good friend of mine was smiling kindly when he asked, “Are you a Patient person?”
I came up with all my answers and reasoning, the flipside of Patience and Impatience, how each virtue has its Pros and Cons. I concluded that I’m working on it, and that compared to last time, my level of Patience with myself and others, has increased so much more.
So he got specific, “In a scale of 1 to 10, how Patient do you think you are?”
I said 5.
“There you go… Ask any of your trusted friends. Would they describe you as Patient? You need to be Patient for what you want to do…”
But at first Fear does what it does best, freaks out, and asks, “Does that mean I cannot do what I want to do, since it’s not in my nature and I’m not PATIENT ENOUGH?”
I listened to my Fear, and allowed it to Inform me.
Love picks up from there, and says, “It’s good you’re Aware of what you need. All of us have different strengths, and different area of struggles. You CAN do what you want to do. Keep GROWING and cultivating Patience, that’s all.
Sounds like a good deal.
Looking back at past relationships, the ONE quality that stands out to me in a Loved One is Patience. They never speak about patience or announce that they are being patient. They don’t even ask of it, from me. They just exude patience, and show it in the way they are with me—the best way they can, for as long as they can, before they hit their human limitations.
I love how GENTLE they are, when they point out something I need to pay attention to. For me, a sure sign someone is Patient with you, is how Gentle they are with you.
It leaves a lasting impression, long after that moment has passed or when they’re gone. This lasting quality is LOVE in action. It feels warm and gentle to your soul.
It feels LOVING.
You feel LOVED.
It’s true what Maya Angelou says. “I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.”
Last night, though the question, “Are you a Patient person?” made me uncomfortable at first, the way it was being asked felt gentle, felt loving, in the end.
That’s Patience, in action.
Being reminded that PATIENCE always feels good in the end, makes it worth the effort of practising Patience, though it’s not easy, initially.
It gets easier with practice.
And I have a feeling, it gets easier and easier because you’re reminded more and more that being PATIENT with yourself and others feels good.
It feels really good.
And you know, as an encouragement to others who are more hot-blooded like I am (LOL!), they say that what you admire in others, already exists in you.
You can’t possibly see and admire something in others, when you don’t already have it within yourself. We see others, as we are.
The idea is to really dig in, and find a way to unearth that quality you admire in others, that’s already hidden within you.
It takes Patience, but You’re worth it.
“Have patience with all things, but first of all, yourself.” – St. Francis de Sales
“Fear less, hope more; Eat less, chew more; Whine less, breathe more; Talk less, say more; Love more, and all good things will be yours.”- Swedish Proverb
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